Study finds orange people twice as likely to catch Covid-19
Washington. A groundbreaking new study reports that orange people are twice as likely to catch…
Ana-Maria Taut
Donald Trump reportedly listening to Gaga’s ‘Till it happens to you’ on repeat
Washington – Still-president Donald Trump who contracted Covid-19 from one of his top advisors is…
Kim Jong-un has a blast watching the first Trump-Biden debate
Pyongyang. North Korea. Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un had a wonderful time last night watching the…
Swiss shops start selling Christmas chocolates in September
Zürich. Switzerland. Concerned about the possibility of the world coming to an end before Christmas…
Die SVP kann sich die Begrenzungsinitiative endlich in den Arsch stecken
Bern. Schweiz. Mitglieder der SVP heulen seit knapp zwei Stunden unaufhörlich. Ihr Versuch die schöne…
Area woman pulled over for driving under the influence of Deftones
Sacramento, California. “Roll the windows down, this cool night officer is curious”, were the muffled…
Irishman caught staring at potato for 2 hours straight
Hackballs Cross. Ireland. If you may have thought that the classic Irishman’s dilemma is a…
The Recording Academy strongly recommends keeping your Grammy outside of your toilet bowl
Santa Monica, California. After unprecedented and unnameable events took place yesterday, the Recording Academy has…
Venus leaders activate emergency plan after being identified by humans
Venus. The Milky Way. Much to what would have been the late David Bowie’s dismay,…
Linguists crack the code revealing what WAP actually stands for
The United Stated of America. A little over a month ago rap queen Cardi B…
God’s vision severely impaired by wildfire smoke
The Uppermost Heavens. Archangel Raphael informed humanity this morning that God had been rushed to…
Basil serial killer on the loose in the Greater Zürich Area
Zürich. Switzerland. Several herb and vegetable shops have alarmed the police on Saturday morning reporting…
Hell freezes over as international community cannot foot heating bill
Planet Earth. Late Sunday night eight of the nine temperature alarms in the forechambers of…
Hungary shuts borders after constant request from population to relive totalitarian experience
Budapest. Hungary. Hungarian Prime Minister, Viktor Orbán, finally gave in to fulfilling a long-lasting desire…
Area woman promoted to Chief of Grammar Police as word crime soars during pandemic
Correctionville, Iowa. Area woman, Shamela Weisenheimer, a devoted language enthusiast and tireless social media commentator,…